desire

Everybody has certain desires, but it's another thing to be able to know and acknowledge them completely. Of course it's very important not to sit back and wait until all will happen automatically. On the other hand, pursuing desires can be very frustrating if you are mentally not orientated towards the fullfilment of desires. Even if you happen to succeed, you might end up being unstatisfied, because you expect life to give you something more. It won't. Reality has very explicit 'borders'. Situations which can't be more perfect than they are. Recognizing and appreciating these ends depends on the attitude you take towards life in general.

Having desires means there probably is someone having them. The basic problem is the stance towards this 'me'. It's not strange to think you know the 'me' very deeply. That's the basic function of it; to give you an identity. The point is, this self of yours has certain desires. This fact gives it a very specific character. The self has a way of being of it's own, which won't change because of your ideas and opinions about it. You are not some angelic kind of being who only lives on divine grace. You are a being who craves to have and be influenced by very specific things; like food, safety, sex and recognition. The fundamental essence of this being is egoism, or more positively, self-centeredness. From this, all desires spring forth.

Luckily we humans can be caring too, because unbridled egoism would make a very cold world. The interesting thing is, the caring for others seems to be rooted in a recognition of mutual egoism. We want others to be fulfilled, because we recognize they have the same basic constitution. Humans also have a sense of justice. If I want someone to love me, it's only fair to return love too. Of course, in practice no one thinks rationally about such things. The feeling of love automatically makes us want to care for the other. It can't be denied however that humans desire such relationships. That there is a basic self-interest which motivates people to do these things.

Egoism is often understood as a having things for oneself, at the expense of someone else. Of course this may happen sometimes, but it's stupid to take such an idea as the underlying motive of all actions. It's perfectly possible to desire things without wanting others to be deprived of them. Altruism, a devotion to the interests of others, has a certain beauty about it, but it's very strange also. It's weird to deny your own interests and acknowledge those of others. If you think living a life of radical sobriety is a good thing to do, it's more logical to want others to live sober also. So there's even a more 'pure' form of altruism thinkable. It's denying your own interests and denying those of others too. Which would, ironically, lead to a very egoistic world, were no one cares for each other.